Thursday, March 27, 2008

Big Penis Syndrome

This syndrome can be characterized by the individual having many deficiencies, but as long as they have a large schlong, than all else is forgiven by their confidant. For example:

The Couch Potato-
I have no job, my gut is ever-expanding, and my idea of "physical training" is lifting a 12oz. or the remote. But as long as my peter doesn't shrink -- who cares!

Cars make great "f--k mobiles." Having a big pecker allows you to get by on even the rustiest of sorts for all that matters is you have a car -- any car! If you are not one of the gifted, you probably have to overcompensate by owning a vehicle a notch or two up in class. Hence the big penis owner has an advantage by saving money, too.

Well, you don't need one. You can be the biggest, most piggish prick imaginable, but as long as your big tool continues to perform at optimum girth and/or length, relationship tensions usually can be solved in the bedroom. The rest of us have to go see a psychologist (maybe to subconsciously address that our "size" is the "real" issue -- LOL!). No, life isn't fair.

The grungy look is almost always acceptable to the beholder of a big one. Jeans with holes are OK provided they are attractively form-fitting. You can look like a right slob, but for the rest of us that means our main store outlet cannot be the Five & Dime, for clothing, not big penis, is all we have to feel adequate.

You can be the biggest idiot and still get by as long as he's giving her 'The Big O'. Many men have an inferiority complex (not mentioning names) and proceed to spend thousands upon thousands of dollars better educating themselves. These men strive to be the best in their field. They have a level of determination that is unmatched. Some become wealthy, and as a whole they are respected amongst their peers. However, many still end up feeling inferior to the person with the big penis. Hence why not all men were created equal.