[Evil eye stares]
PP: Just wait till you leave for work.
"Prrrrrr..."
PP: I will now stretch and sink my claws into your lap, wondering why you are screaming at me.
[Head bobb]
PP: Oh, a birdie! Unfortunately this damn window is blocking my path of attack.
[Snuggle]
PP: I love you. Now I can shed all over you, and in the other room there is a plant knocked on the floor.
[RAAAAR!]
PP: (1)You didn't pet me today! (2)I'm drawing territorial lines with that other cat I hate. (3)No, Mister. I am not in heat.
[ ]
PP: Human, I'm not listening to whatever scolding you are trying to give me.
[Looks up, pauses, and then walks away]
PP: Would you tell that damn dog outside to shut up.
[Lies stretched on back]
PP: (1) Well aren't I pretty? (2) What are you waiting for? Pet me.
[Crawls on desk]
PP: I will lay on the paperwork you are trying to get done.
Thursday, April 28, 2005
Friday, April 15, 2005
skeptical advertising part 1
"First year FREE!"
PP: Second year twice the regular price of the first year.
"No Payments No Interest"
PP: Interest rate thereafter will be double the going rate."
"We can accomodate any credit rating"
PP: 40% APR. Not bad!
"BLOW OUT SALE!"
PP: Aged leftovers.
"One Day Sale"
PP: Hurry! We can't get rid of the crap.
"Candy 2/$1"
PP: Isn't that the same stuff from a few years ago?
"Baked Fresh"
PP: But delivered from the other side of the country.
"$1 for 1/2 gallon of chilled orange juice"
PP: Stockperson left it out overnight. Had to get rid of it in a hurry.
"Blended Juice"
PP: To cover up the aged smell from the one juice.
"2 for $4"
PP: 1 for $2. Don't get greedy on me.
"Homemade"
PP: Nothin' like the "homemade" taste of Auntee's Apple Pie that's sold by the crate full.
"These businesses support our local farmers with pride!"
PP: By buying the commercial brand from the grocery store. That helps.
PP: Second year twice the regular price of the first year.
"No Payments No Interest"
PP: Interest rate thereafter will be double the going rate."
"We can accomodate any credit rating"
PP: 40% APR. Not bad!
"BLOW OUT SALE!"
PP: Aged leftovers.
"One Day Sale"
PP: Hurry! We can't get rid of the crap.
"Candy 2/$1"
PP: Isn't that the same stuff from a few years ago?
"Baked Fresh"
PP: But delivered from the other side of the country.
"$1 for 1/2 gallon of chilled orange juice"
PP: Stockperson left it out overnight. Had to get rid of it in a hurry.
"Blended Juice"
PP: To cover up the aged smell from the one juice.
"2 for $4"
PP: 1 for $2. Don't get greedy on me.
"Homemade"
PP: Nothin' like the "homemade" taste of Auntee's Apple Pie that's sold by the crate full.
"These businesses support our local farmers with pride!"
PP: By buying the commercial brand from the grocery store. That helps.
acronym adjusting part 1
RDA: Recommended Daily Allowance
PP: Rapid Death Assistance
FDA: Food & Drug Administration
PP: Fat & Disease Accomodators
US Army: Uncle Sam Ain't Released Me Yet -or in reverse- Yes My Retarded Ass Signed Up
ACLU: American Civil Liberties Union
PP: Association of the Criminal Liberties Undertakings
SOS- Not a real acronym. MAYDAY is the common distress call or association to SOS.
PP: Sailor Offering Sex
PETA: People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals
PP: People Eating Tasty Animals
NASA: National Association of Sentencing Advocates
NASA: Negligent Attorney's Seeking Amnesty
POT: Pharmaceutical Optimized Treatment
If that wasn't enough-
PP: Puffing on Taxes
PP: Rapid Death Assistance
FDA: Food & Drug Administration
PP: Fat & Disease Accomodators
US Army: Uncle Sam Ain't Released Me Yet -or in reverse- Yes My Retarded Ass Signed Up
ACLU: American Civil Liberties Union
PP: Association of the Criminal Liberties Undertakings
SOS- Not a real acronym. MAYDAY is the common distress call or association to SOS.
PP: Sailor Offering Sex
PETA: People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals
PP: People Eating Tasty Animals
NASA: National Association of Sentencing Advocates
NASA: Negligent Attorney's Seeking Amnesty
POT: Pharmaceutical Optimized Treatment
If that wasn't enough-
PP: Puffing on Taxes
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