skeptical advertising part 2

"QUALITY AT A DISCOUNT"
PP: discounted quality

"10% Off"
PP: Taxes make up for the difference.

"Enjoy a night on the town!"
PP: At your expense!

"Made for you. Made for a lifetime."
PP: Considering a lifetime sentence is only 20 years, I guess that isn't saying much.

"Forget about muddy and dusty roads forever!"
PP: Isn't that kind of an impossibility considering roads are made of dirt?

"Who you gonna call?"
PP: Ghostbusters?

"$8-$30"
PP: Make your mind up.

"10/88 cents"
PP: Too much work in my head. Round it to the next even dollar.

"YES... We're open again!"
PP: I'd better not ask why you were closed to begin with.

"SMELT FRY"
PP: I sure hope it does otherwise it wouldn't be considered food.

"All vehicles have $1000 Bonus Cash Back!"
PP: We raised the price, but you'll feel like your saving alot with the cash back.

"We have our Roots where others have their Branches."
PP: slightly confusing

"Call Chainsaw Dave Today!"
PP: Scary in a horror-like manner.

"Free Estimates!"
PP: Excessive Costs!

"The Largest Sale in our History is Almost Over!"
PP: Bankruptcy Sale!

"FURN1TURE First"
PP: I hope so considering this is a furniture store.

"1-800-DUMPCABLE"
PP: Nah. Better not inquire.